The feelings that never spoke...

Yeah, we all, in one way or another, have feelings that can never be communicated to another person for any and every particular reason. Somehow lately, I'm realizing that those feelings are starting to pent up, more than ever... It seems like as if I really don't want to leave this timeline behind, the friends that I've made, suddenly disappearing to god-knows-where, and somehow, these feelings are making me tear up again for the 1st time ever since after secondary school... Yes, even we guys may cry when dealt with emotional issues, and truly, loneliness is beckoning out to me once again, wanting me to slip back in, retract to the confined space that I so remembered vividly before meeting them. Yet, somewhere, in me, doesn't want to. The feelings that never spoke for the last 6 years, finally spoke again, this time, only more resoundingly, more fiercely, more passionately, like as if someone re-lit the fire in it. And yes, I unconsciously re-lit it... Despite my smiles, I've begun to realize, that these memories, once which I never bothered to deal with, suddenly now all the more became important, and precious. In a way, I really don't want to lose them, for they are the ones who had made the biggest impact in my entire life, and despite my ever-grumbling mouth not saying it, somber feelings have once again re-emerged within me, clashing with the loneliness deep within, the sparks sending with it, a flurry of emotions I haven't felt in the last 6 years... I know that time can't be reversed, due to the laws of entropy (sorry for the explicit use of science here), but I don't want to move on, knowing fully well that some will go away, and others, though staying, may not make that difference seem so obvious... worst of all, I'm losing not just the person, but also the memories that I would have associated with them... It hurts, to know that I will leave them, and move forward alone, into the future unknown, into the world that now, looks all the more somber to me... black and white, with a thin line of gray, which I rest in... Guys, thank you for all that you have done, you know who you are, and really, thank you for dealing with this mindless, innocent brat whom you call a friend...

Somehow, recently, I'm beginning to rant ALOT, so I'm sorry, and yes, there is hardly any of sora's events, so therefore, my blogs have started to look like autumn leaves, so sorry for those reading, hopefully, in this winter season, I may be able to find some sliver linings to celebrate (otherwise, this is gonna be a bleak Christmas season...) and party in this festive season, and the weather in Singapore is starting to suck... rainy days aplenty... see you amigos next time!!

P.S: Blogging is hard work on my English!!